Chili for Lazy, Unoriginal Dummies


I am going to start sharing some of the things I cook.  If you are expecting some gourmet recipes you can prepare yourself for disappointment.  Most of my recipes/meals are family friendly and require little to no effort on my part.  That's not to say that sometimes I don't get fancy and serve my family something that refines their taste buds. Having said that, I get little complaints from my man and boys when I serve my meals to them.  It may be because they actually enjoy the meal or are just glad they are being fed in general.  Who knows. Suzy Homemaker, I am not.  I love my family to pieces, I work full time, I pay the bills, I grocery shop, I take care of all their needs, I give them all the love that I have and it overflows out of their bodies because of the quantity I give them.  At the end of the day that is what is important.  

Now on to the point of this post....Chili.  Chili is the one dish where people have been known to have knock down/drag out fights over the best way to make it.   Some people swear that great chili has a perfect blend of spiciness and sweetness.  Some people think if you don't cook spaghetti noodles in it that you are the anti-christ.  

When I make chili it takes me 35 minutes from preparation to finish.  The most energy I use is opening up all the cans.  The chili police have a warrant out for my arrest.  

Here is what I use: 
(hamburger not pictured)

2 cans of Diced Tomatoes
2 cans of Bush's Chili Magic
1 can of chili beans
1 can of tomato sauch
1/2 pound of ground beef
Chili Powder
Cincinnati Chili Spice


I ground the beef.  I try to buy ground beef that doesn't look wormy.  My husband doesn't pay attention when I send him to the store.  See below...


I open up all the cans and dump them in a big cooking pot.  I don't pay any mind to the nutritional information on the back.


I add the beans!   I love beans.  Beans are lovely.  
It is the food of the hobos after all.


I add the two spices - Chili Powder and Cincinnati spice.  I take the chili powder bottle and turn it over the pot of chili and shake nine times.  I shake the Cincy spice three times.  I am SO precise when I cook. :)


The end result.  I have to make two separate pots because I don't like meat in my chili.  Basically I like chili sauce, spices and beans.  Garnish with shredded cheddar cheese, sour cream (if desired) and crackers.  Spaghetti also optional.


This is what I look like when I cook.  Pretty much looks like a catastrophe yet the meal turns out pretty well, considering.



Next time on Hobo Cooking....
How to learn to find and cook one dish that you become good at making and take that everywhere you go (like pitch-ins) so that everyone leaves with the impression you are the best cook to ever exist.  When, in reality, that is pretty much the only thing you have exerted the most effort to get really good at it.  Those people ask for the recipe and you promise you'll email them and never do.  You can't risk losing that dish monopoly. 

Question:  Do you have a special way you make chili?

7 comments :

Pickleope said...

"Beans are little clouds of delicious!" My favorite line (of course enhanced by the subtext of the clouds causing a storm in your lower belly). It sounds like you like vegetarian chili. Nothing wrong with that. I also love the "shake" measurement method.

KSK said...

:) I was just thinking about making chili! **I grew up pouring my chili over mashed potatoes.. it's really good, however, my husband thought I was insane -- until he tried it :)

**And I totally tell people that I'll give them my recipes and then don't! I need that praise! ;)

Sian said...

haha 'wormy ground beef disgusts me' that made me snort my food through my nose...

You cooking looks very similar to me in the kitchen actually. My hubby fears for my safety when I'm in there. Luckily he's awesome at cooking so it doesn't happen too often...

Miss Teacher said...

I love your method of cooking! It's very similar to mine.
Your food looks far more appetising than the stuff I serve up though...

Tonya the Hobo Girl said...

Chili on mashed potatoes is a definite first. I don't judge people's way of eating. I only judge when they hate food that is obviously delicious. Like, my husband hates cornbread. CORNBREAD! Insanity.

Vapid Vixen said...

You know, I think maybe...just maybe, I may be able to make this. What with your precise measurements and all. How can I go wrong?

Wormy beef? Seriously disgusting. One more item to add to my suspect food list. Thanks for the heads up.

Jessica DeWitt said...

It took me damn near 30 min's to read this post - I got distracted on "my husband doesn't pay attention" and then just kept clicking links from there. I forgot I was reading about chili. It's a genius ploy to filter traffic through...
On to the chili... Texas is one of those places that has a claim in chili. I like it sweet and spicy, most definitively with meat. I wouldn't consider chili without meat chili at at... Maybe just chili flavored soup...
I'm so glad I started reading your blog!

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